PARIS, France – Notorious international crime lord Carmen Sandiego eluded capture on a technicality once again when it was revealed that investigators had once again forgotten to obtain a legal search warrant.
Since 1983, Sandiego has been charged with somehow stealing numerous international landmarks such as the Eiffel Tower, Mount Rushmore, the Taj Mahal, and the Grand Canyon, as well as the entire states of New York, Wyoming, and Oregon.
“[Sandiego] is a double-dealing diva with a taste for thievery. Although Sandiego and many of her associates have once again eluded the iron hand of justice, we are not giving up hope,” stated chief investigator The Chief. “Go get ‘em, gumshoes.”
So far, investigators have in custody many members of Sandiego’s V.I.L.E. gang (a crime syndicate headed by Sandiego), including henchmen “RoboCrook” and “Vic the Slick”. However, many of Sandiego’s henchmen, including the notorious henchmen pair known as Double Trouble, remain at large.
“I saw a woman with blue eyes here just yesterday,” an unidentified restaurant owner told investigators Monday, giving them another lead. “She was talking about seeing the Tundra Falls in some country that you'll have to look up in an atlas in order to send your plane there to get the next clue.”
Last month, a serious crack in the case was established when investigators found out that one of Sandiego’s hired crooks likes tennis, Mexican food, is a male, and has a tattoo on his left leg. A suspect matching this description was last seen in Egypt, somehow carrying away the Pyramids while hopping clumsily away on a pogo stick.
